What to Expect When You’re… Dead, Chapter Seventeen

The Zombie Chronicles

Chapter Seventeen

Partners in Crime Fighting

I have a side-kick, the zombie has a side-kick. That’s frickin’ hilarious don’t you think? But I’m getting a bit ahead of myself here. In my desperate attempt to kill the boredom I joined the neighborhood watch and even though, as I had said, I was a bit unsure about the whole situation it turned out to be one of the best things I could have done. Continue reading

Soooo Tired

It’s the fourth (or is it the fifth? I’ve lost track,) night in a row that the alarm clock’s bright red numbers mock me and sleep is still nowhere in sight. I’ve officially slipped into the realm of the sleep deprived zombie. I know there was something that I was supposed to be doing, but I can’t for the life of me remember what that was. Oh yeah! Duh, I’m supposed to be writing a blig… I mean blog; I think. 

It’s nice and dark and my eyes are heavy, and the pillow is soft under my head. Just when I start to drift into that blissful realm of unconsciousness… pop! ‘Would the automotive department have a chrome spiral that would work for my project? If I went back through the settings and changed it over to headset mode could I get the speaker to work? How would I go about making homemade swiss rolls?’… and on and on. Before one thought is finished another is there to take its place and my brain has entered that crazy pinball phase.

Now I stare at the screen… hey what does this button do… %$##*&**^%%. Error… Melon… Melon…Redo From Start… Oh! So I’m just going to close my eyes for a second and… crack…(head hits keyboard) Night night.

Ummm…..

I stare at that stupid blinking curser line that reminds me; yet again, that I need to write something… anything for my blog, my next book, or whatever. Still my mind is as blank as the white page on my screen; sans blinking curser that is. I think it’s mocking me, but maybe that’s just me. At night when I‘m lying in bed trying to get to sleep, idea after idea wants to bounce through my head like some no-doze pinball machine, but as soon as I bring up my word page to get it down… nada. Ahhhhhh!

I keep telling my husband that I need one of those tee shirts that says, “I can’t brain today, I have the dumb”. Sounds about right some days. Why is it that you can know exactly what it is you need to say to the person on the other end of the phone (that you’ve been on hold for the past 20 minutes waiting for); even practicing what it is you want to say, until they say “Hello?” and then all rational thought goes right out the window and you’re left stumbling around the alphabet trying not to sound too much like a complete moron while discussing your account to the very nice and understanding person waiting on the other end of the line? (Who incidentally is thinking, “Come on get on with it lady, the clock’s running for crying out loud!”)

To all those customer service reps that have helped me over the years when an attack of brain fog has settled in quicker than… *Brain Fog*…. *Stand by*… *rebooting*…. Thank you, customer service reps for your patience and understanding and I’m so sorry for taking up your time tripping over my own tongue. Now if I could only do something about that stupidly annoying, blinking curser line. It’s still mocking me; see there it goes again. Blink… blink… blink… ahhhhhh!

What to Expect When You’re… Dead, Chapter Sixteen

The Zombie Chronicles

Chapter Sixteen

The Thing That Goes Bump in the Night

I’m bored, bored out of my skull bored. Not sleeping has it’s advantages and for a while it was pretty awesome, but the bloom is definitely off the rose. Or should I say the stink is definitely on the corpse. I started trying to figure out new ways of spending my endless amount of time, but let’s face it I’m kind of limited. My eyes glazed over after all the hours gaming and at one point even got stuck in my sockets. It took me nearly six hours and three bottles of eye drops to be able to look left and right again.

I repainted every room in my house; twice. Learned a new language. Read every book I owned and when they ran out I joined one of those online libraries and read until every book started to sound like every other book I had already read. I watched every movie and TV show I could stomach on Netflix ( and in desperation, a few I couldn’t). So yeah, like I said, I was bored to death. I guess my next move wasn’t so crazy as I first thought. Continue reading

Ouch! That Hurt…

I’ve been stabbed, shot, bitten (yes bitten), beheaded, disemboweled, crushed, speared, (a.k.a. ran through with a pole), pulled apart, and burned and yes they all hurt. Some more than others. No, I’m not a character in one of my books or some psycho’s torture victim. I am a lucid dreamer and even though I wouldn’t give up this amazing ability… sometimes, it sucks. Continue reading

Coming Soon

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Calynn Moore was happy with life. She had a job she loved, a place all her own, and a future worth looking forward to. Then a stranger showed up on her doorstep that led her into a world she never wanted to know existed and can’t escape from. Now she’ll have to play the role of a lifetime to keep from becoming the main course, but can she keep her sanity? Will it matter in the end?